The Lost Meditation of Soul

July 9, 2006, Sydney

My face in the mirror

with mask hidden in my eyes,

I see all images of terror

every god would despise.

I am crucified for my sins,

a saint with no place in heaven;

I am lost without a shepherd –

wandering like a wingless bird.

My heart cries like a child

soft, weak, and about to die;

alone in a secret dark cell

wishing my life as just a dream.

I contemplate the Holy Trinity

of Buddha, Allah, and Jesus –

I ask for relief and peace

for my life to become precious.

As I hear the bells from the church,

a voice whispers in my ears:

“Why go to an endless search

when your life is full of fear?”

Now I ask the God who speaks –

I wait, listen, but no reply.

Why then I keep on asking

when no answer is certain?

I live now like a fool,

lost aimless kind of soul:

my hands are begging for mercy –

Wisdom – so quiet and humble.